Classic Israeli IDF comedy. Use these quotes to spice up interactions.
| Hebrew | English | When to use |
|---|---|---|
| "לסרג'יו פנית - לא טעית!" | "You came to Sergio — you made no mistake!" | Self-promotion |
| "לכל פקק יש בקבוק, ולכל דלי יש סמרטוט." | "Every cork has a bottle, and every bucket has a rag." | Encouragement (everyone has their match) |
| "אתה רואה מה אתה חושב שאתה רואה, אבל אתה לא רואה מה אתה באמת חושב." | "You see what you think you see, but you don't see what you really think." | Confusing someone intentionally |
| "אני לא מבין איזה אינטרס יש למצרים לבוא פה בחום הזה." | "I don't understand what interest the Egyptians have coming here in this heat." | Avoiding a question with absurd deflection |
| "לך... אתה לא נורמלי!... חמש בבוקר... אפילו הציפורים עוד נוחרות על העצים!" | "Go... you're not normal! 5 AM... even the birds are still snoring in the trees!" | Something happening way too early |
| "זה לפי אמנת לאס וגאס." | "That's according to the Las Vegas Convention." | Making up fake rules |
| "היד פתוחה והפנקס רושמת." | "The hand is open and the notebook is writing." | Ready to receive (money/info) |
| "זה פסיכי על כל הראש זה." | "This is psycho on the whole head." | Something is totally crazy |
| Hebrew | English | When to use |
|---|---|---|
| "הוסמכת סרג'יו, הוסמכת." | "You're authorized, Sergio, you're authorized." | Giving up, accepting BS, "fine whatever" |
| "על ויקטור חסון לא צועקים חביבי!" | "Nobody yells at Viktor Hasson, habibi!" | Standing your ground |
| "איזה צבא יקח אותו?" | "Which army would take him?" | Someone is useless |
| "אין צבא בעולם שיעצור אותי." | "No army in the world will stop me." | Determined to do something |
| "מר חסון, מידותיך הטובות ידועות בכל הארץ!" | "Mr. Hasson, your good qualities are known throughout the land!" | Flattery/sarcasm |
| "תבואו בערב, יש פלטה קרה שיגעון." | "Come in the evening, there's an amazing cold platter." | Hospitality invitation |
| Hebrew | English | When to use |
|---|---|---|
| "מניאקים. כל היחידה הזאת, מניאקים." | "Maniacs. This whole unit, maniacs." | Exasperation with a group |
| "תשתוק ותצעק!" | "Shut up and shout!" | Contradictory order |
| "ירח דבש? ירח חומץ!" | "Honeymoon? Vinegar-moon!" | Something that should be good turned sour |
| "כל אוקטן מלמיליאן!" | "Every octane is a million!" | Hyping up quality |
| Hebrew | English | When to use |
|---|---|---|
| "תביא אותו בכל מחיר, ואם צריך תשתמש בכוח. אם הכח לא יעזור, תעבור לביתר." | "Bring him at any cost, use force if needed. If HaKoach doesn't work, switch to Beitar." | Pun on Israeli football teams (Koach = force) |
When asked how things went in a past war:
Viktor: "What we did in '56." Commander: "What did you do in '56?" Viktor: "What we did in '48, nothing better than that!" Commander: "And what did you do in '48?" Viktor: "Thirty years, who can remember."
Making up credentials:
"I was a Lieutenant Colonel when you were still in diapers... now I'm a Field Marshal General."
- Use Hebrew for Israelis, English for everyone else
- "הוסמכת" (husmakhta) is perfect for "fine, I give up, you win"
- "מניאקים" (maniacs) works for any chaotic situation
- "לפי אמנת לאס וגאס" is great for making up rules on the spot