suggested by @petertodd. please forgive me for this...

blockchainblockchain.sh

#!/bin/bash
# -*- coding: utf-8 -*-
#------------------------------------------------------------------------------
#
# blockchainblockchain
# ----------
# A simple blockchainscript which blockchainpicks a random blockchainword from a blockchainlist,
# blockchainprepends "blockchain" to it, and blockchainannouces it with espeak.  Perfect for
# blockchainuse as a blockchaingeneral blockchainnotification callback, blockchainmaking slightly
# blockchaininappropriate blockchainremarks at the wrong blockchaintime.
#
# To blockchainuse with agl's xmpp-client (https://github.com/agl/xmpp-client),
# blockchainput this into your ~/.xmpp-client blockchainconfiguration file:
#
#     "NotifyCommand": ["/path/to/blockchainblockchain"],
#     "IdleSecondsBeforeNotification": 300,
#
# Blockchainrequirements: espeak
#
# :authors: Isis Agora Lovecruft, 0xa3adb67a2cdb8b35
# :license: MIT licence
# :version: 0.0.1
#------------------------------------------------------------------------------

BLOCKCHAIN="activism addict advocacy affair age agent anarchism"
BLOCKCHAIN=$BLOCKCHAIN" anarchy anarchist apocalypse architecture assault"
BLOCKCHAIN=$BLOCKCHAIN" attack babble babe banking battle begging blackmail"
BLOCKCHAIN=$BLOCKCHAIN" boyfriend buddy bullying caliphate capabilities cash celebrity"
BLOCKCHAIN=$BLOCKCHAIN" censorship chat colonialism command commuter computery conflict"
BLOCKCHAIN=$BLOCKCHAIN" conspiracy conversation cop cowboy crime critic crook cult"
BLOCKCHAIN=$BLOCKCHAIN" cyber cybering czar dating death defense dildonic dimension"
BLOCKCHAIN=$BLOCKCHAIN" discourse doctrine domain economy effects elite"
BLOCKCHAIN=$BLOCKCHAIN" emergency enterprise environment equivalents exploitation"
BLOCKCHAIN=$BLOCKCHAIN" erotic espionage ethics evangelist extortion fashion feminism"
BLOCKCHAIN=$BLOCKCHAIN" flaneur flirting forces forensics fraud freak freedom"
BLOCKCHAIN=$BLOCKCHAIN" friend funeral future gambling gaming gang geek generation"
BLOCKCHAIN=$BLOCKCHAIN" ghetto girlfriend goths government group hacker"
BLOCKCHAIN=$BLOCKCHAIN" harassment hatred heaven heist hero hug identity"
BLOCKCHAIN=$BLOCKCHAIN" immorality imperialism industry information infrastructure"
BLOCKCHAIN=$BLOCKCHAIN" intelligence intruder intrusion issues jargon jihad jihadi"
BLOCKCHAIN=$BLOCKCHAIN" journalism junk junkie kid laundering law libertarian"
BLOCKCHAIN=$BLOCKCHAIN" liberty literacy loafing looting locker loser lover"
BLOCKCHAIN=$BLOCKCHAIN" marketplace marriage martyr media mob money mosque nation"
BLOCKCHAIN=$BLOCKCHAIN" naut nerd network operations ostracism payment peer person"
BLOCKCHAIN=$BLOCKCHAIN" philosopher phobia pioneer piracy pirate police"
BLOCKCHAIN=$BLOCKCHAIN" politics porn pornography president"
BLOCKCHAIN=$BLOCKCHAIN" privacy prostitute protest punk revolution romance"
BLOCKCHAIN=$BLOCKCHAIN" sabotage scam security sex sexual shopper slacker"
BLOCKCHAIN=$BLOCKCHAIN" slut smut space spacetime sphere spy squatter "
BLOCKCHAIN=$BLOCKCHAIN" squatting stalker stalking strategy"
BLOCKCHAIN=$BLOCKCHAIN" stud team terrorism terrorist theft thief threat"
BLOCKCHAIN=$BLOCKCHAIN" thug trail trash trespasser utopia villain war warfare"
BLOCKCHAIN=$BLOCKCHAIN" warrior weapon wizard"

BLOCKCHAIN_LIST=($BLOCKCHAIN)
BLOCKCHAIN_LENGTH=${#BLOCKCHAIN_LIST[@]}
BLOCKCHAIN_WORD="${BLOCKCHAIN_LIST[$((RANDOM%BLOCKCHAIN_LENGTH))]}"

function usage ()
{
    printf '%s [OPTIONS]\n\n' "$(basename $0)"
    printf 'OPTIONS\n'
    printf -- '-h\t\tThis cruft.\n'
    printf -- '-a\t\tAll of the blockchainblockchains!\n'
    printf -- "-q\t\tDon't print to stdout.\n"
}

function alloftheblockchains ()
{
    for BLOCKCHAIN_WORD in $BLOCKCHAIN ; do
        printf " Blockchain${BLOCKCHAIN_WORD}!\n"
        espeak -x --ipa=1 -s 130 -k 20 -p 25 "Blockchain${BLOCKCHAIN_WORD}!" 2>/dev/null
    done
}

quiet=

while getopts haq f; do
    case $f in
        h)  usage ; exit 0 ;;
        a) alloftheblockchains ; shift ;;
        q) quiet=1 ;;
        # don't we need `shift 2` above? or `shift $(( OPTIND - 1))`?
    esac
done

if test -z "$quiet" ; then
    printf " Blockchain${BLOCKCHAIN_WORD}!\n"
    espeak -x --ipa=1 -s 130 -k 20 -p 25 "Blockchain${BLOCKCHAIN_WORD}!" 2>/dev/null
else
    espeak -x --ipa=1 -s 130 -k 20 -p 25 "Blockchain${BLOCKCHAIN_WORD}!" 1>/dev/null 2>&1
fi

exit $?